T E X T F I L E S
Textfiles With a Sense of Fun
When the textfiles.com collection was just a lot of files at the Works BBS (which I was the SysOp of from 1986-1988), I had several major collections to sort all the text into: Humor, Phreak, Hack, Anarchy, etc. Of course, when I sat back to create this new website from many more files, I found it was better to add more classifications so we wouldn't end up with too many thousand-file directories.
However, there always seemed to be those files that were easily classifiable, but which would have only one or two files in it at most, if I were to make a whole directory for them. Or, I'd have to make a section that was just gardening. I don't want to make a directory dedicated to gardening.
So, I'd shove these weird files into the 'Fun' section. They were always entertaining in some fashion, but they weren't humor. They often preached whacky things, but they weren't conspiracies or political rants. They were just... ...fun.
I've gone through this section a few times, and cleaned it out to go into other sections, but every time I'm adding files, some of the whacky ones always end up here. I guess that's how it'll always be: The Grab Bag.
CAA
The Incredible Computing Across America, by Steven K. Roberts
PHOTON
PHOTON/index.gmi
$tripes.txt
Information about Keeping Track of Your Money So It's Not Counterfieted
10code.txt
The official National "Ten Code" Signal
430pm.hum
Odd little event at 4:30pm
acronym.txt
A Collection of Modern Acronyms
acronyms
Collection of All Sorts of Internet and BBS Jargon
advert.txt
Choosing an Advertising Agency, by Don Kobes
afri.txt
African Words, Numerals, and Sentences (Used by Former Slaves in Georgia and South Carolina in the 1890s)
agency.txt
How to Start Your Own Travel Agency
agn101.txt
Booking An Agent 101
agora.txt
Agoraphobia: Description and Symptoms, from the Freedom from Fear Foundation
ai.txt
Some Thoughts on the Natural Language ESPERANTO
airbag.txt
Emegency Rescue Guidelines for Air Bag Equipped Cars
aj-life
Life Sucks: AJ's Philosophies and Ramblings by Robert Alan Seace (Agrajag/AJ)
aj-life2
Life Sucks II: The Rantings of a Madman, Robert Seace (Agrajag/AJ)
aj-life3
Life Sucks III: Life in the Real World, by Robert A. Seace (Agrajag/AJ)
alpine.txt
ALPINE 1810 CD Shuttle Control by Ole Buzzard (November 15, 1993)
alt_book.txt
A Small Collection of Alternative Reading Materials
amalgam.txt
Some Alternatives to Amalgam
amchap7.txt
The Eye Detector: Use Dialtion to Your Advantage
amtrak.txt
All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990
amtrak1.txt
All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990
amtrak2.txt
All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990 (Part II)
annoy.txt
Gweed is annoted how people zip up collections of textfiles
antimatr
Balloon Campaign Will Seek Evidence of Antimatter Galaxy
anything.phk
How to Connect Anything to Anything, by Jason!
applic.txt
Crimefighters Membership Application
arctic.txt
Learn Esperanto!
armstech.txt
Jane's Fighting Ships 1990-1991 (Specifications of Warships)
arttext.fun
The art of writing textfiles. What you needed to know.
arubyint
Introduction to Ruby's Pearls
arubypro
Ruby's Pearls: Promotional Blurb
ast-dece.txt
ast-dece.txt
ast-dorn.txt
ast-dorn.txt
ast-list.txt
ast-list.txt
ast-prog.txt
ast-prog.txt
ast500hr.txt
ast500hr.txt
astronau.txt
astronau.txt
attila.art
Attila the Hun and the Battle of Chalons by Arther Ferrill
auto
Suggestions for Auto Mar
autogide.txt
Buying Your Massachusetts Automobile Insurance
autoscam.txt
A Guy Takes his Fine Oldsmobile Out for a Ride and to the Mechanics of the Country
bathrm.txt
G Saintiny writes about the glories of the bathroom, from the Winter Solstace 1990 EV Will and Word
battery.txt
Glenn Sahlin's Introduction to Batteries
batteryn.ews
batteryn.ews
bikaholc.txt
Are Your a Bikaholic? by Dick Sorensen (June 25, 1992)
bike.txt
Charlie Lear's Adventerous Day in Biking
bikelite.txt
Project for Building a Bike Light
billrights.fun
The Bill of Rights "Lite" by John Perry Barlow
blackbel
What Does a Black Belt Mean? by Reverend Kensho Furyua
blackhol.nas
blackhol.nas
blackhol.txt
blackhol.txt
blckjack.txt
Blackjack: Card Counting for the Complete Klutz, from Steven Jacobs
blkholes.fun
blkholes.fun
blood
How to Make Realistic Blood (Recipes)
bodybild.txt
Bodybuilding Myths
bonsai.txt
The Timeless Art of Bonsai
bonsai_c.oll
How to Start a Bonsai Collection
bookshop.txt
R.A.B. Bookstore List of Cambridge and Boston (May 26, 1992)
boring.txt
How Not to Be Boring at a Party, by Jim Douglas
bpythons.txt
Ball Python Care in Captivity, by Melissa Kaplan and Kyle Wohlmut
brcredit.txt
How to Establish a Good Credit Rating, by Jay Anderson, Loan Broker 1986
brittish.txt
Table of British and Amrtican English Words
bulbs.txt
Summer Flowering Bulbs in the Home Landscape
burmese_python_faq.txt
Burmese Pythod: Care in Captivity (February 20, 1995)
bwash.txt
The Battle for Your Mind, by Dick Sutphen
car.txt
Buy a New Car in Europe
carcheck.dos
A Used Car Checklist: What to Check when you Buy a Used Car
carcodes.txt
Codes Used by Computers in GM Cars
cards3.txt
Mass Murderer Trading Cards Set III
carradio.txt
Working with Old Car Radios
cat_haiku.txt
A Collection of Cat Haikus
cchess.rul
Chinese Chess: Xiang Qi
celebrity.txt
The Celebrity Autograph Kit Version 1.0 by Louis Martinez (1993)
charitbl.txt
Tax Information: Regarding Charitable Contributions of Property other than Cash or Stock
charlen.art
Random Thoughts: A Charlen's Eye View of the Decades of Human Life by Charlen Kyle
chemburn.ana
chemburn.ana
chinesec.hum
A Collection of Chinese Curses
chinesez.odc
The Lunar Calendar
choosing.cat
choosing.cat
chronolo.gy
The Timeline of Akido Master Morihei Ueshiba
circadia.txt
circadia.txt
cleaning
Some Clean-Up Tips
clubs.txt
Boston Area Nightclubs: Compiled April 16, 1990)
coldfuse.pat
coldfuse.pat
coldfusn.txt
coldfusn.txt
collect.phk
What you should know about Collection Agencies
collecti.txt
A List of Animal Collectives
college.txt
How to Get into College by Ian Osmond
color.cht
Chat of different colors and patterns of cat fur (Choose your cats!)
comics.fun
The Comic Book Collectors Handbook
comsec1.txt
COMSEC Bulletin #1 (February 17, 1990)
consult.how
How to be a Computer Consultant: A Guide
contacts.wrn
Do NOT wear contact lenses near Electric Arcs!
couch
How to be a Couch Potato in the Nineties by Francis U. Kaltenbaugh
cpoet-01.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 1 (March 14, 1994)
cpoet-02.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 2 (March 14, 1994)
cpoet-03.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 4 (March 14, 1994)
cpoet-04.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 4 (March 14, 1994)
cpoet-05.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 5 (March 14, 1994)
cpoetkib.txt
Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Journal (March 14, 1994)
crystal1.asc
crystal1.asc
darkfaq.txt
The Star Wars: Dark Forces FAQ by Karsten A. Loepelmann (Version 1.0, February 10, 1995)
deadend.fun
Phiction by Tristan Farnon himself
dean1
Fairmount writes about James Dean
decsocsec.txt
Decoding Social Security Numbers (September 8, 1992)
dip.txt
Abbreviations for Map Regions
disable.rd
disable.rd
disclmr.txt
A Very Massive Disclaimer
discover.txt
discover.txt
divright.txt
Divine Rights by Paul W. Will AK Koordar
dma.nfo
How to Eliminate or Brush off Telemarketing Calls
doctmean.dos
The Doctrine of the Mean (Chung-Yung)
dod.faq
What does DOD Mean?
dream-is.txt
Dream Interpretation and Symbology by Raymond Buckland
eclair.txt
The Lotus Eclair: Too Fat to Race
electric.bas
electric.bas
ena!.hac
The ENA Vision: What IS Ena?
enbalm.txt
A Quick Lesson in Do It Yourself Embalming
eng-amer.txt
How "Correct" is British English? By Alex Gross (1992)
english.1st
Official English: A No Vote
english.txt
Here's your Pop Quiz... What do these words mean?
english1.txt
Excerpts from "Crazy English" by Richard Lederer
english2.txt
The Answers to the English Pop Quiz
enid.jok
Rules for the card game of Enid
erma10rules.hum
Erma Bombeck's 10 Rules to live By
espero.txt
Large Advertisement for the Esperanto Language
essays.txt
Art in the Age of Digital Dissemination Class Essays by Brad Brace (1993)
eurodisn
A EuroDisney Report by Tom Drynda (June 17, 1993)
evolve.cat
evolve.cat
evolve.cht
evolve.cht
fairdebt.txt
Fair Debt Collection from Charley Brown's Office of Consumer Protection Division
families.txt
The Ten Mafia Families
faq11109.txt
Disneyland Frequently Asked Questions (November 23, 1994)
farfel-1.txt
Farfel Oddities: Why the Farfel is an Idiot
fculture
A Large Subculture Glossary and Introduction
fighter.pil
Who was the Most Successful Fighter Pilot of All Time?
file
The Aikido Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) List (Version 1.1), May 12, 1994
finall.txt
How to Raise Money for a Small Business
fission.txt
fission.txt
fli-laun.txt
fli-laun.txt
flyer.txt
Esperanto... The International Language
french.txt
Funny French Phrases and Idioms
freud.on.seuss
Freud on Seuss by Josh leBeau
frlnce.fun
How to succeed in freelancing without being 'trying'
frparis-.mis
A Large Selection/Choice List of Must-See Paris Things
fs397.txt
fs397.txt
fs417.txt
fs417.txt
fusion
fusion
fusion.txt
fusion.txt
g-solars.txt
g-solars.txt
gamchess.txt
The Game of Chess
game_y.txt
The Game of Y, with Cool ASCII Illustration
gblevent.txt
Installing a Gable Vent for Your House
gems.01
gems.01
gems.2
gems.2
gems.3
gems.3
gems.4
gems.4
genetics.cat
genetics.cat
german_u.lan
The Truth about the German Language becoming America's Language
glossary.txt
Collection of Varied and Miscellaneous Abbreviations
goddard
goddard
govtfree.txt
Accommodations, Airplane Rides and More for Youth Groups
grammar.jap
The Quite and Dirty Guide to Japanese
gun.txt
gun.txt
halfbdcc.txt
A Simplified Half-Board Game Using a Chinese Chess Set by Roleigh Martin (January 18, 1994)
handyman
Some Suggestions for a Handyman
hazchem.txt
hazchem.txt
heretogo
The Cut-Up Method of Brion Gysin
heritage.lis
UNESCO's World Heritage List (The 10-12 Most Historic Sites)
hghlndrp.txt
Introduction to Playing a Highlander Role-Playing Game
hi-e-wt.txt
hi-e-wt.txt
hi-lo.txt
How to Beat Atlantic City Blackjack, by Michael Hall (1991)
hi-opt-1.txt
How to Beat Single Deck Blackjack Version 1.01 by Michael Hall (1991)
hindu.nam
List of Hindu Names
hiroshim.sp
Talk given by the son of the man who was Gandhi's scribe and secretary
histless.txt
The World According to Studen Bloopers, by Richard Lederer, St. Paul's School
history.cat
The Cat in History, by Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek
horscare.txt
Excerpts from Young's Demonstrative Translation of Scientific Secrets
hot_wate.fas
hot_wate.fas
how2dotv.txt
how2dotv.txt
howto.fun
How to create the Perpetual Party
howtoevaluatenew.txt
How to Evealuate New Members: Weed Out Informants and Agent-Provocateurs
htaquitd
Released to the Media After Dr. Hunter S. Thompson is Exonerate on Various Sex and Weapons Charges (May 31st, 1990)
htt.txt
htt.txt
humble.how
humble.how
icons.txt
David Melnick Suggests some Smileys
implosion.txt
implosion.txt
in_like.fly
The Origin of the Phrase "In Like Flynn"
indians.oh
The History of the Native Americans of the Ohio Valley
indylook.txt
indylook.txt
infinity.jok
infinity.jok
insomnia.txt
Dealing with Insomnia, from Richard
interrog.txt
Intelligence and Interrogation Processes by Master Of Impact and the Legion Of Hackers
intro.txt
intro.txt
invent.rpt
invent.rpt
iqhist.txt
Estimated IQs of Famous People in History 1450-1850
item1.txt
Are You Using Only Half Your Brain?
item2.txt
Hey, Man, Are You Only Using Half Your Brain?
japanese.lsn
Hello Friends! I hold some Easy Japanese Lesson!
jcs-report-1947.txt
jcs-report-1947.txt
jinfo_01.txt
The J: Party: Why Think? Online Propoganda #1.23
joyce
Beyond the Orality/Literacy Dichotomy: James Joyce and the Pre-History of Cyberspace
ka.txt
ka.txt
koreanc.txt
The Rules for Korean Chess
land-tur.txt
land-tur.txt
latin.stu
A Study Guide to Wheelock Latin
lavalamp.txt
Lava Lamp Plans (January 13, 1995)
lazarusn.txt
Excerpts from ~The Notebooks of Lazarus Long~ by Robert A. Heinlein
lemmings.txt
Lemming Level Codes
leverage.txt
The Beauty (And Beast) Of Leverage, by Dianne Maley
loglan.txt
Brochure for Loglan, the "Logical Language"
lotto.asc
Suggestions and Hints for Lottery Beating
lovebase.txt
A Database of Love Poems by Kevin Solway 1992 (Version 1.6)
lowball.txt
The Book of Lowball by Justic Case
lyingninja.txt
How To Be a Lying Ninja!
lyme.bc
Ticks, Lyme Disease and You
macsfarm.old
The Tragic Tale of Old MacDonald's Farm, a Personnel Saga by A. Mouse
maine_coon_cats.txt
A Collection of Information about Maine Coon Cats (May, 1994)
maze.how
How to Build a Maze
measure.sug
measure.sug
medicine
medicine
memetics
memetics
mensa.txt
Questions and Answers about the Mensa Organization
mera.pk
Mera Peak (21,600 feet), Nepal by Chris Ellingham
merkle1.txt
merkle1.txt
merkle2.txt
merkle2.txt
mind1.asc
mind1.asc
mind3.asc
The Indian Rope Trick and Mind Control by Fakirs
mind5.asc
mind5.asc
mind6.asc
mind6.asc
monorail.faq
The Complete Walt Disney World Monorail FAQ
moon.txt
moon.txt
mtg-tour.txt
Magic: The Gatheric Official Tournament Rules (August 1, 1994)
mulch.txt
Mulches Serve Many Purposes (Gardening)
newbie
The Newbie Guide to Martial Arts Training (ver 2.5) by Jeff Pipkins
nocredit.txt
No Credit? Here's how to get started on your own!
north.txt
A Test to See If You've Settled in Northern England
nostrada.txt
The Prophecies of Nostradumus, a List (August, 1986)
nukecat.txt
nukecat.txt
nukewar.txt
NUKE: The Nuclear Age Magazine: Do-It-Yourself How To Start
nutritio.cat
Feline Nutrition by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek
nwu
Statement of Principles on Contracts between Writers and Electronic Book Publishers by the National Writers Union, Prepared by Philip Mattera (April 1994)
obsearth.txt
obsearth.txt
ok_etymo.of
The Etymology of "Okay!"
oniongam.txt
The Insane Card Game of Cripple Mr. Onion
ooberel.txt
A Collection of Relaxation Techniques
orbiter.txt
orbiter.txt
orbname.txt
orbname.txt
orgspook.txt
The Author Attends a Party at Lord British's Home
origin.txt
A Visit to Origin Systems
outdoor.bc
The Backcountry Turing Test
palindro.txt
A Collection of Palindromes
perparty.fun
Creating the Perpetual Party
pion.fun
Extensive(!) listing of Broadcasting Pioneers
plane.txt
How to Make a Paper Airplane
plantpai.txt
plantpai.txt
plots.txt
The Thirty-Seven Dramatic Situations
pms.fun
Truth is Stranger than Fiction. Documented BAD case of PMS.
poison.dig
The Poisons of the Realm (For a Game)
posh_ety.of
The Etymology of the word "Posh"
project1.txt
Astral Projection Part I by the Joker and The occult Crue
project2.txt
Astral Projection Part II by The Joker and The Occult Crue
pronatal.txt
Examples of Pregnancy Terminations in Different Cultures
purebred.cat
Purebred Cats by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek
puzzle.jok
puzzle.jok
q&a
The Most Commonly Asked Questions about Building Loudspeaker Enclosures
q-books.txt
Quilting and Quilt-Related Books Compiled for Quiltnetters
qalam.txt
QALAM: A Convention for Morphological Arabic-Latic-Arabic Transliteration
qconst
How I Got Out of It
quake.txt
I survived the World Series Earthquake of 1989!
quotes
An Enormous Amount of Quotes about Life from Many People
quotes.txt
Large Collection of Quotes by Famous People
rad-damage.txt
A Note About Radiation Damage by The Red Phoenix (1994)
ramp.fun
Building a Skateboard Ramp, before Skating was big.
reality.txt
The Reality of the Situation, by Kortron
repos.txt
Buying a Car or Truck through Repossesion Auctions by Paul Dewey
rid.txt
Getting Rid of the Riddler by Alien
rightplay.fun
Your Certificate Giving you the Right to Play
rockets.txt
Present Day Soviet Launch Vehicles
rses_cfc.txt
Refrigerants and the Atmosphere (November 1989)
school.txt
A True American's Guide to Success in Lower Education by Peregrinus Jupiter, 1992
sci-skep
sci-skep
scoutide.txt
Boy Scouts Advancement List, getting a New Scout to 1st Class in less than 1 year
scouting.fir
Scouting Campfire Skits, Yells and Other Silly Things
scrotum_.rep
The Unusual Case of the Scrotum Self-Repair
search.txt
Searching Your Family Tree: A Primer
seedlawn.txt
How to Seed a 1200 Square Foot Lawn
shuttle.fun
shuttle.fun
silver.txt
silver.txt
slang.col
The College Slang Dictionary 1989
slime
How to Make Slime, by Black September
smiley.txt
The Unofficial Smiley Dictionary
snake.bc
Snake Bites: Distilled Wisdom, January 11, 1993
snuffit1.mag
Snuff It! #1: The Magazine of the First Church of Euthanasia
snuffit2.mag
Snuff It! #2: The Magazine of the First Church of Euthanasia
sochap18.txt
TRICK: The Impossible Coin Pickup
sochap6.txt
TRICK: Two Bottles and a Bill
socsec
Knowing Where Someone Came From By Their Social Securit Number
songlrya.fun
Lyrics to "Feline" by the Stranglers
soviet.pre
soviet.pre
sovsdi.txt
sovsdi.txt
spam1.txt
The Story of Spam, by Raphael Dareau (September 7, 1991)
spam2.txt
The Story of Spam, Volume 2
spam3.txt
The Story of Space Volume 3
spam3h.txt
The Story of Spam Volume 3 1/2 (December 20, 1991) by Raphael Dareau
spam3hh.txt
The Story of Spam Volume Three 1/2 1/2
spam4.txt
The Story of Spam Volume 4
spatial.txt
Spatial Deconcentration by Yolanda Ward
species.cat
The Wild Cats by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek
species.cht
The Cat Family
spooner.lis
List of Spoonerisms, Malapropisms, and other Funnies said by Noel's Co-Worker
ssan.txt
The Social Security Numbers, from Barbara Bennett
stat.jok
A Friend Gets a Contentless Mathematics Paper in (August 12, 1990)
stchap1.txt
TRICK: Using a Broom for The Big Push
stchap8.txt
TRICK: Only You Can Tear This
stcheats.txt
Collection of Atari ST Cheats
stndrds
stndrds
stocks.92
Daily Close Information for the Dow Jones and Standard and Poor's for 1992
stuf
How do i Get Published? Then What Do I Do? By Kathy Fieler
suicide.txt
Suicide Methods from Alt. Suicide.Holiday
sysop.txt
Sysop Documentation for Citadel BBS Software
tacomanarrows.txt
Some Analysis of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge, by Dino
tapman.txt
An Interview with Abbie Hoffman
taxonomy.dat
taxonomy.dat
taxonomy.txt
taxonomy.txt
teller-ulam.txt
teller-ulam.txt
think.txt
A Compilation of Thoughts by someone named SUICIDAL
thropart.txt
How to Throw a Real Party, by The Gremlin and Chronos of Knights of the Black Circle
time.txt
The Modern View of Time
timeline.lst
Historical Events Chosen at Random, 217-Present
trestump.txt
How to Remove a Tree Stump
trivia.fun
The Trivia Blab, an experiment gone flat.
tsfetus.txt
Toxic Shock presents How Must I Beat Thee? By Gross Genitalia
upccode.ana
Some rough information on decoding bar codes
urdu.dic
The Small-Sized Irdu Dictionary
usbernec.txt
A Compilation of Position Statements, Statues and other Information Policies
usedcar.fun
Tips for buying used cars
vgrjup.fs
vgrjup.fs
vgrnep.fs
vgrnep.fs
vgrsat.fs
vgrsat.fs
vgrur.fs
vgrur.fs
vietnam.cpu
A Glossary of Vietnam Computer Terms and their English Equivalents
visitors.ham
Do the English Like the Americans? By Nigel Ballard
vocab-ee.txt
English to Esperanto Glossary
w-fact-1.txt
Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 1 (1990)
w-fact-2.txt
Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 2 (1990)
w-fact-3.txt
Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 3 (1990)
w-fact-4.txt
Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 4 (1990)
w-fact-5.txt
Complete Collection of World Facts Volume 5 (199)
w-fact-6.txt
Complete Collection of World Facts Volume 6 (1990)
wanted.mag
WANTED: A Few Good Writers
warning.txt
Larry Schenk says NOT to Drive a Subaru
watfilt.bc
Information on various water filter technologies
wavedest
Destinations: The South Shore: Bay of Fundy, Nova Scotia, from Jan/Feb 1994 WaveLength Magazine
way.fun
Finding a way up the tree. What is the tree? Discuss.
wcs.txt
wcs.txt
wdw4-92.txt
The Very Unofficial Guide to Walt Disney World, by Rodd D. McCartney, 1992 Edition
welding-.txt
Points to Remember When doing MIG Welding
welsh.ref
Resources for Adult Learners of Welsh
what!.fun
The word math problem from hell.
whatisfc
What IS Futureculture? By Andy Hawks of Mindvox (January 29, 1993)
worldtv.txt
Exchanging VHS Cassettes with Foreign Viewers and Using VHS Recorders Abroad
wrestler.txt
A Collection of Professional Wrestlers and their Real Name
writegoo.txt
How to Write Good, by Frank L. Visco
writerul.txt
William Safire's Rules for Writing
wsbintrv.fun
William S. Burroughs Interview
xq.rul
Introduction to the Ancient Game of Chinese Chess, or Xiangqi, Version 2, by Peter Donnelly
zerosite.txt
Introduction/Situation file for Noriko Ariushi aka "Zero", from Shadowrun