T E X T F I L E S

Textfiles With a Sense of Fun

When the textfiles.com collection was just a lot of files at the Works BBS (which I was the SysOp of from 1986-1988), I had several major collections to sort all the text into: Humor, Phreak, Hack, Anarchy, etc. Of course, when I sat back to create this new website from many more files, I found it was better to add more classifications so we wouldn't end up with too many thousand-file directories.

However, there always seemed to be those files that were easily classifiable, but which would have only one or two files in it at most, if I were to make a whole directory for them. Or, I'd have to make a section that was just gardening. I don't want to make a directory dedicated to gardening.

So, I'd shove these weird files into the 'Fun' section. They were always entertaining in some fashion, but they weren't humor. They often preached whacky things, but they weren't conspiracies or political rants. They were just... ...fun.

I've gone through this section a few times, and cleaned it out to go into other sections, but every time I'm adding files, some of the whacky ones always end up here. I guess that's how it'll always be: The Grab Bag.

CAA

The Incredible Computing Across America, by Steven K. Roberts

PHOTON

PHOTON/index.gmi

$tripes.txt

Information about Keeping Track of Your Money So It's Not Counterfieted

10code.txt

The official National "Ten Code" Signal

430pm.hum

Odd little event at 4:30pm

acronym.txt

A Collection of Modern Acronyms

acronyms

Collection of All Sorts of Internet and BBS Jargon

advert.txt

Choosing an Advertising Agency, by Don Kobes

afri.txt

African Words, Numerals, and Sentences (Used by Former Slaves in Georgia and South Carolina in the 1890s)

agency.txt

How to Start Your Own Travel Agency

agn101.txt

Booking An Agent 101

agora.txt

Agoraphobia: Description and Symptoms, from the Freedom from Fear Foundation

ai.txt

Some Thoughts on the Natural Language ESPERANTO

airbag.txt

Emegency Rescue Guidelines for Air Bag Equipped Cars

aj-life

Life Sucks: AJ's Philosophies and Ramblings by Robert Alan Seace (Agrajag/AJ)

aj-life2

Life Sucks II: The Rantings of a Madman, Robert Seace (Agrajag/AJ)

aj-life3

Life Sucks III: Life in the Real World, by Robert A. Seace (Agrajag/AJ)

alpine.txt

ALPINE 1810 CD Shuttle Control by Ole Buzzard (November 15, 1993)

alt_book.txt

A Small Collection of Alternative Reading Materials

amalgam.txt

Some Alternatives to Amalgam

amchap7.txt

The Eye Detector: Use Dialtion to Your Advantage

amtrak.txt

All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990

amtrak1.txt

All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990

amtrak2.txt

All-Time Amtrak Diesel Locomotive Roster as of August 29, 1990 (Part II)

annoy.txt

Gweed is annoted how people zip up collections of textfiles

antimatr

Balloon Campaign Will Seek Evidence of Antimatter Galaxy

anything.phk

How to Connect Anything to Anything, by Jason!

applic.txt

Crimefighters Membership Application

arctic.txt

Learn Esperanto!

armstech.txt

Jane's Fighting Ships 1990-1991 (Specifications of Warships)

arttext.fun

The art of writing textfiles. What you needed to know.

arubyint

Introduction to Ruby's Pearls

arubypro

Ruby's Pearls: Promotional Blurb

ast-dece.txt

ast-dorn.txt

ast-list.txt

ast-prog.txt

ast500hr.txt

astronau.txt

attila.art

Attila the Hun and the Battle of Chalons by Arther Ferrill

auto

Suggestions for Auto Mar

autogide.txt

Buying Your Massachusetts Automobile Insurance

autoscam.txt

A Guy Takes his Fine Oldsmobile Out for a Ride and to the Mechanics of the Country

bathrm.txt

G Saintiny writes about the glories of the bathroom, from the Winter Solstace 1990 EV Will and Word

battery.txt

Glenn Sahlin's Introduction to Batteries

batteryn.ews

bikaholc.txt

Are Your a Bikaholic? by Dick Sorensen (June 25, 1992)

bike.txt

Charlie Lear's Adventerous Day in Biking

bikelite.txt

Project for Building a Bike Light

billrights.fun

The Bill of Rights "Lite" by John Perry Barlow

blackbel

What Does a Black Belt Mean? by Reverend Kensho Furyua

blackhol.nas

blackhol.txt

blckjack.txt

Blackjack: Card Counting for the Complete Klutz, from Steven Jacobs

blkholes.fun

blood

How to Make Realistic Blood (Recipes)

bodybild.txt

Bodybuilding Myths

bonsai.txt

The Timeless Art of Bonsai

bonsai_c.oll

How to Start a Bonsai Collection

bookshop.txt

R.A.B. Bookstore List of Cambridge and Boston (May 26, 1992)

boring.txt

How Not to Be Boring at a Party, by Jim Douglas

bpythons.txt

Ball Python Care in Captivity, by Melissa Kaplan and Kyle Wohlmut

brcredit.txt

How to Establish a Good Credit Rating, by Jay Anderson, Loan Broker 1986

brittish.txt

Table of British and Amrtican English Words

bulbs.txt

Summer Flowering Bulbs in the Home Landscape

burmese_python_faq.txt

Burmese Pythod: Care in Captivity (February 20, 1995)

bwash.txt

The Battle for Your Mind, by Dick Sutphen

car.txt

Buy a New Car in Europe

carcheck.dos

A Used Car Checklist: What to Check when you Buy a Used Car

carcodes.txt

Codes Used by Computers in GM Cars

cards3.txt

Mass Murderer Trading Cards Set III

carradio.txt

Working with Old Car Radios

cat_haiku.txt

A Collection of Cat Haikus

cchess.rul

Chinese Chess: Xiang Qi

celebrity.txt

The Celebrity Autograph Kit Version 1.0 by Louis Martinez (1993)

charitbl.txt

Tax Information: Regarding Charitable Contributions of Property other than Cash or Stock

charlen.art

Random Thoughts: A Charlen's Eye View of the Decades of Human Life by Charlen Kyle

chemburn.ana

chinesec.hum

A Collection of Chinese Curses

chinesez.odc

The Lunar Calendar

choosing.cat

chronolo.gy

The Timeline of Akido Master Morihei Ueshiba

circadia.txt

cleaning

Some Clean-Up Tips

clubs.txt

Boston Area Nightclubs: Compiled April 16, 1990)

coldfuse.pat

coldfusn.txt

collect.phk

What you should know about Collection Agencies

collecti.txt

A List of Animal Collectives

college.txt

How to Get into College by Ian Osmond

color.cht

Chat of different colors and patterns of cat fur (Choose your cats!)

comics.fun

The Comic Book Collectors Handbook

comsec1.txt

COMSEC Bulletin #1 (February 17, 1990)

consult.how

How to be a Computer Consultant: A Guide

contacts.wrn

Do NOT wear contact lenses near Electric Arcs!

couch

How to be a Couch Potato in the Nineties by Francis U. Kaltenbaugh

cpoet-01.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 1 (March 14, 1994)

cpoet-02.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 2 (March 14, 1994)

cpoet-03.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 4 (March 14, 1994)

cpoet-04.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 4 (March 14, 1994)

cpoet-05.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Part 5 (March 14, 1994)

cpoetkib.txt

Cyberpoet's Guide to Virtual Culture Journal (March 14, 1994)

crystal1.asc

darkfaq.txt

The Star Wars: Dark Forces FAQ by Karsten A. Loepelmann (Version 1.0, February 10, 1995)

deadend.fun

Phiction by Tristan Farnon himself

dean1

Fairmount writes about James Dean

decsocsec.txt

Decoding Social Security Numbers (September 8, 1992)

dip.txt

Abbreviations for Map Regions

disable.rd

disclmr.txt

A Very Massive Disclaimer

discover.txt

divright.txt

Divine Rights by Paul W. Will AK Koordar

dma.nfo

How to Eliminate or Brush off Telemarketing Calls

doctmean.dos

The Doctrine of the Mean (Chung-Yung)

dod.faq

What does DOD Mean?

dream-is.txt

Dream Interpretation and Symbology by Raymond Buckland

eclair.txt

The Lotus Eclair: Too Fat to Race

electric.bas

ena!.hac

The ENA Vision: What IS Ena?

enbalm.txt

A Quick Lesson in Do It Yourself Embalming

eng-amer.txt

How "Correct" is British English? By Alex Gross (1992)

english.1st

Official English: A No Vote

english.txt

Here's your Pop Quiz... What do these words mean?

english1.txt

Excerpts from "Crazy English" by Richard Lederer

english2.txt

The Answers to the English Pop Quiz

enid.jok

Rules for the card game of Enid

erma10rules.hum

Erma Bombeck's 10 Rules to live By

espero.txt

Large Advertisement for the Esperanto Language

essays.txt

Art in the Age of Digital Dissemination Class Essays by Brad Brace (1993)

eurodisn

A EuroDisney Report by Tom Drynda (June 17, 1993)

evolve.cat

evolve.cht

fairdebt.txt

Fair Debt Collection from Charley Brown's Office of Consumer Protection Division

families.txt

The Ten Mafia Families

faq11109.txt

Disneyland Frequently Asked Questions (November 23, 1994)

farfel-1.txt

Farfel Oddities: Why the Farfel is an Idiot

fculture

A Large Subculture Glossary and Introduction

fighter.pil

Who was the Most Successful Fighter Pilot of All Time?

file

The Aikido Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) List (Version 1.1), May 12, 1994

finall.txt

How to Raise Money for a Small Business

fission.txt

fli-laun.txt

flyer.txt

Esperanto... The International Language

french.txt

Funny French Phrases and Idioms

freud.on.seuss

Freud on Seuss by Josh leBeau

frlnce.fun

How to succeed in freelancing without being 'trying'

frparis-.mis

A Large Selection/Choice List of Must-See Paris Things

fs397.txt

fs417.txt

fusion

fusion.txt

g-solars.txt

gamchess.txt

The Game of Chess

game_y.txt

The Game of Y, with Cool ASCII Illustration

gblevent.txt

Installing a Gable Vent for Your House

gems.01

gems.2

gems.3

gems.4

genetics.cat

german_u.lan

The Truth about the German Language becoming America's Language

glossary.txt

Collection of Varied and Miscellaneous Abbreviations

goddard

govtfree.txt

Accommodations, Airplane Rides and More for Youth Groups

grammar.jap

The Quite and Dirty Guide to Japanese

gun.txt

halfbdcc.txt

A Simplified Half-Board Game Using a Chinese Chess Set by Roleigh Martin (January 18, 1994)

handyman

Some Suggestions for a Handyman

hazchem.txt

heretogo

The Cut-Up Method of Brion Gysin

heritage.lis

UNESCO's World Heritage List (The 10-12 Most Historic Sites)

hghlndrp.txt

Introduction to Playing a Highlander Role-Playing Game

hi-e-wt.txt

hi-lo.txt

How to Beat Atlantic City Blackjack, by Michael Hall (1991)

hi-opt-1.txt

How to Beat Single Deck Blackjack Version 1.01 by Michael Hall (1991)

hindu.nam

List of Hindu Names

hiroshim.sp

Talk given by the son of the man who was Gandhi's scribe and secretary

histless.txt

The World According to Studen Bloopers, by Richard Lederer, St. Paul's School

history.cat

The Cat in History, by Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek

horscare.txt

Excerpts from Young's Demonstrative Translation of Scientific Secrets

hot_wate.fas

how2dotv.txt

howto.fun

How to create the Perpetual Party

howtoevaluatenew.txt

How to Evealuate New Members: Weed Out Informants and Agent-Provocateurs

htaquitd

Released to the Media After Dr. Hunter S. Thompson is Exonerate on Various Sex and Weapons Charges (May 31st, 1990)

htt.txt

humble.how

icons.txt

David Melnick Suggests some Smileys

implosion.txt

in_like.fly

The Origin of the Phrase "In Like Flynn"

indians.oh

The History of the Native Americans of the Ohio Valley

indylook.txt

infinity.jok

insomnia.txt

Dealing with Insomnia, from Richard

interrog.txt

Intelligence and Interrogation Processes by Master Of Impact and the Legion Of Hackers

intro.txt

invent.rpt

iqhist.txt

Estimated IQs of Famous People in History 1450-1850

item1.txt

Are You Using Only Half Your Brain?

item2.txt

Hey, Man, Are You Only Using Half Your Brain?

japanese.lsn

Hello Friends! I hold some Easy Japanese Lesson!

jcs-report-1947.txt

jcs-report-1947.txt

jinfo_01.txt

The J: Party: Why Think? Online Propoganda #1.23

joyce

Beyond the Orality/Literacy Dichotomy: James Joyce and the Pre-History of Cyberspace

ka.txt

koreanc.txt

The Rules for Korean Chess

land-tur.txt

latin.stu

A Study Guide to Wheelock Latin

lavalamp.txt

Lava Lamp Plans (January 13, 1995)

lazarusn.txt

Excerpts from ~The Notebooks of Lazarus Long~ by Robert A. Heinlein

lemmings.txt

Lemming Level Codes

leverage.txt

The Beauty (And Beast) Of Leverage, by Dianne Maley

loglan.txt

Brochure for Loglan, the "Logical Language"

lotto.asc

Suggestions and Hints for Lottery Beating

lovebase.txt

A Database of Love Poems by Kevin Solway 1992 (Version 1.6)

lowball.txt

The Book of Lowball by Justic Case

lyingninja.txt

How To Be a Lying Ninja!

lyme.bc

Ticks, Lyme Disease and You

macsfarm.old

The Tragic Tale of Old MacDonald's Farm, a Personnel Saga by A. Mouse

maine_coon_cats.txt

A Collection of Information about Maine Coon Cats (May, 1994)

maze.how

How to Build a Maze

measure.sug

medicine

memetics

mensa.txt

Questions and Answers about the Mensa Organization

mera.pk

Mera Peak (21,600 feet), Nepal by Chris Ellingham

merkle1.txt

merkle2.txt

mind1.asc

mind3.asc

The Indian Rope Trick and Mind Control by Fakirs

mind5.asc

mind6.asc

monorail.faq

The Complete Walt Disney World Monorail FAQ

moon.txt

mtg-tour.txt

Magic: The Gatheric Official Tournament Rules (August 1, 1994)

mulch.txt

Mulches Serve Many Purposes (Gardening)

newbie

The Newbie Guide to Martial Arts Training (ver 2.5) by Jeff Pipkins

nocredit.txt

No Credit? Here's how to get started on your own!

north.txt

A Test to See If You've Settled in Northern England

nostrada.txt

The Prophecies of Nostradumus, a List (August, 1986)

nukecat.txt

nukewar.txt

NUKE: The Nuclear Age Magazine: Do-It-Yourself How To Start

nutritio.cat

Feline Nutrition by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek

nwu

Statement of Principles on Contracts between Writers and Electronic Book Publishers by the National Writers Union, Prepared by Philip Mattera (April 1994)

obsearth.txt

ok_etymo.of

The Etymology of "Okay!"

oniongam.txt

The Insane Card Game of Cripple Mr. Onion

ooberel.txt

A Collection of Relaxation Techniques

orbiter.txt

orbname.txt

orgspook.txt

The Author Attends a Party at Lord British's Home

origin.txt

A Visit to Origin Systems

outdoor.bc

The Backcountry Turing Test

palindro.txt

A Collection of Palindromes

perparty.fun

Creating the Perpetual Party

pion.fun

Extensive(!) listing of Broadcasting Pioneers

plane.txt

How to Make a Paper Airplane

plantpai.txt

plots.txt

The Thirty-Seven Dramatic Situations

pms.fun

Truth is Stranger than Fiction. Documented BAD case of PMS.

poison.dig

The Poisons of the Realm (For a Game)

posh_ety.of

The Etymology of the word "Posh"

project1.txt

Astral Projection Part I by the Joker and The occult Crue

project2.txt

Astral Projection Part II by The Joker and The Occult Crue

pronatal.txt

Examples of Pregnancy Terminations in Different Cultures

purebred.cat

Purebred Cats by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek

puzzle.jok

q&a

The Most Commonly Asked Questions about Building Loudspeaker Enclosures

q-books.txt

Quilting and Quilt-Related Books Compiled for Quiltnetters

qalam.txt

QALAM: A Convention for Morphological Arabic-Latic-Arabic Transliteration

qconst

How I Got Out of It

quake.txt

I survived the World Series Earthquake of 1989!

quotes

An Enormous Amount of Quotes about Life from Many People

quotes.txt

Large Collection of Quotes by Famous People

rad-damage.txt

A Note About Radiation Damage by The Red Phoenix (1994)

ramp.fun

Building a Skateboard Ramp, before Skating was big.

reality.txt

The Reality of the Situation, by Kortron

repos.txt

Buying a Car or Truck through Repossesion Auctions by Paul Dewey

rid.txt

Getting Rid of the Riddler by Alien

rightplay.fun

Your Certificate Giving you the Right to Play

rockets.txt

Present Day Soviet Launch Vehicles

rses_cfc.txt

Refrigerants and the Atmosphere (November 1989)

school.txt

A True American's Guide to Success in Lower Education by Peregrinus Jupiter, 1992

sci-skep

scoutide.txt

Boy Scouts Advancement List, getting a New Scout to 1st Class in less than 1 year

scouting.fir

Scouting Campfire Skits, Yells and Other Silly Things

scrotum_.rep

The Unusual Case of the Scrotum Self-Repair

search.txt

Searching Your Family Tree: A Primer

seedlawn.txt

How to Seed a 1200 Square Foot Lawn

shuttle.fun

silver.txt

slang.col

The College Slang Dictionary 1989

slime

How to Make Slime, by Black September

smiley.txt

The Unofficial Smiley Dictionary

snake.bc

Snake Bites: Distilled Wisdom, January 11, 1993

snuffit1.mag

Snuff It! #1: The Magazine of the First Church of Euthanasia

snuffit2.mag

Snuff It! #2: The Magazine of the First Church of Euthanasia

sochap18.txt

TRICK: The Impossible Coin Pickup

sochap6.txt

TRICK: Two Bottles and a Bill

socsec

Knowing Where Someone Came From By Their Social Securit Number

songlrya.fun

Lyrics to "Feline" by the Stranglers

soviet.pre

sovsdi.txt

spam1.txt

The Story of Spam, by Raphael Dareau (September 7, 1991)

spam2.txt

The Story of Spam, Volume 2

spam3.txt

The Story of Space Volume 3

spam3h.txt

The Story of Spam Volume 3 1/2 (December 20, 1991) by Raphael Dareau

spam3hh.txt

The Story of Spam Volume Three 1/2 1/2

spam4.txt

The Story of Spam Volume 4

spatial.txt

Spatial Deconcentration by Yolanda Ward

species.cat

The Wild Cats by R. Roger Breton and Nancy J. Creek

species.cht

spooner.lis

List of Spoonerisms, Malapropisms, and other Funnies said by Noel's Co-Worker

ssan.txt

The Social Security Numbers, from Barbara Bennett

stat.jok

A Friend Gets a Contentless Mathematics Paper in (August 12, 1990)

stchap1.txt

TRICK: Using a Broom for The Big Push

stchap8.txt

TRICK: Only You Can Tear This

stcheats.txt

Collection of Atari ST Cheats

stndrds

stocks.92

Daily Close Information for the Dow Jones and Standard and Poor's for 1992

stuf

How do i Get Published? Then What Do I Do? By Kathy Fieler

suicide.txt

Suicide Methods from Alt. Suicide.Holiday

sysop.txt

Sysop Documentation for Citadel BBS Software

tacomanarrows.txt

Some Analysis of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge, by Dino

tapman.txt

An Interview with Abbie Hoffman

taxonomy.dat

taxonomy.txt

teller-ulam.txt

teller-ulam.txt

think.txt

A Compilation of Thoughts by someone named SUICIDAL

thropart.txt

How to Throw a Real Party, by The Gremlin and Chronos of Knights of the Black Circle

time.txt

The Modern View of Time

timeline.lst

Historical Events Chosen at Random, 217-Present

trestump.txt

How to Remove a Tree Stump

trivia.fun

The Trivia Blab, an experiment gone flat.

tsfetus.txt

Toxic Shock presents How Must I Beat Thee? By Gross Genitalia

upccode.ana

Some rough information on decoding bar codes

urdu.dic

The Small-Sized Irdu Dictionary

usbernec.txt

A Compilation of Position Statements, Statues and other Information Policies

usedcar.fun

Tips for buying used cars

vgrjup.fs

vgrnep.fs

vgrsat.fs

vgrur.fs

vietnam.cpu

A Glossary of Vietnam Computer Terms and their English Equivalents

visitors.ham

Do the English Like the Americans? By Nigel Ballard

vocab-ee.txt

English to Esperanto Glossary

w-fact-1.txt

Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 1 (1990)

w-fact-2.txt

Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 2 (1990)

w-fact-3.txt

Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 3 (1990)

w-fact-4.txt

Collection of Complete World Facts Volume 4 (1990)

w-fact-5.txt

Complete Collection of World Facts Volume 5 (199)

w-fact-6.txt

Complete Collection of World Facts Volume 6 (1990)

wanted.mag

WANTED: A Few Good Writers

warning.txt

Larry Schenk says NOT to Drive a Subaru

watfilt.bc

Information on various water filter technologies

wavedest

Destinations: The South Shore: Bay of Fundy, Nova Scotia, from Jan/Feb 1994 WaveLength Magazine

way.fun

Finding a way up the tree. What is the tree? Discuss.

wcs.txt

wdw4-92.txt

The Very Unofficial Guide to Walt Disney World, by Rodd D. McCartney, 1992 Edition

welding-.txt

Points to Remember When doing MIG Welding

welsh.ref

Resources for Adult Learners of Welsh

what!.fun

The word math problem from hell.

whatisfc

What IS Futureculture? By Andy Hawks of Mindvox (January 29, 1993)

worldtv.txt

Exchanging VHS Cassettes with Foreign Viewers and Using VHS Recorders Abroad

wrestler.txt

A Collection of Professional Wrestlers and their Real Name

writegoo.txt

How to Write Good, by Frank L. Visco

writerul.txt

William Safire's Rules for Writing

wsbintrv.fun

William S. Burroughs Interview

xq.rul

Introduction to the Ancient Game of Chinese Chess, or Xiangqi, Version 2, by Peter Donnelly

zerosite.txt

Introduction/Situation file for Noriko Ariushi aka "Zero", from Shadowrun

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