T E X T F I L E S
Textfiles of a Humorous or Funny Nature
This directory is filled with files that I considered funny, or trying to
be funny. In some cases, the files might better belong in other sections
because of their chosen subject matter, but usually, someone is just trying
to make others laugh. Hopefully you'll laugh too, or at least marvel
that someone actually thought the chosen subject was humorous.
The sense of humor that people show online is pretty well varied; some
people write fantastic diatribes on stupidity or weirdness they experience
in their lives, some parody other common text files, and some just transcribe
funny columns or jokes they heard. The range in this directory is, for the
moment, beyond easy categorization.
COMPUTER
COMPUTER/index.gmi
JOKES
JOKES/index.gmi
MLVERB
MLVERB/index.gmi
REAL
The "Real" Guides
TAGLINES
Collections of One-Liners
101nos.txt
101nos.txt
1988.hilite
1988.hilite
20types
The 20 Types of People You Might Meet in the Men's Room
21types.txt
21types.txt
59insn.txt
The Warning Signs of Insanity
a-zfuck.txt
The A-Z of Foul Language, by Deadbeat/Independent
aa.jok
The Alcoholics' Anthem (To the Tune of Men of Harlech)
abbott.txt
The Famous Abbott and Costello "Who's on First?" Routine
aclamt.txt
Supposed Medical Terms for Unpleasant, but Funny, Situations, from the National Lampoon
acronym.lis
All Over List of Acronyms, 1990
acronym.txt
Acronyms for the 1990's
acronyms.txt
A Public-Domain Acronym/Abbreviation List
adcopy.hum
Jason writes a bizzare Satanic Ad
addrmeri.txt
Merit Badges for Man Scouts
admin.txt
The Discovery of Administratium, the Heaviest Element
advrtize.txt
It's an Ad Ad Ad Ad World
age.txt
Were You Born Before 1945? You're a Survivor!
aggie.txt
Letter from Aggie Mother to Her Son
aids.txt
AIDS: Fact or Fiction? by Mr. Yuk, Mr. Telephone, and Mr. Weather (January 11, 1986)
airlines
The Things I Hate and Love about Airlines, by Michael Rosen
alabama.txt
Alabama Mom to Alabama Son (A Letter)
alcatax.txt
The Alcoholics' Tax Return
alflog.txt
My Life on Planet Earth: ALF's Secret Diary
ambrose.bie
The Devil's Dictionary: Assulting Society
amchap2.txt
How to Do a Kung-Fu Coin Grab
anim_lif.txt
Life Imitating Art (About Growing Up in a Anime High School) by Curtis H. Hoffmann (November 28, 1992)
annoy.fascist
101 Ways to Annoy a Facist by The Deth Vegetable and Lyndon LaRouche
answers
Quick Answers to General Subjects. Well, Sort of.
anthropo.stu
The Pedagological Tribal System of Primitive Cultures of the Scientific Research Community by Sara Duncan
arab.dic
Useful Phrases to Know When Traveling in Muslim Areas
argotdic.txt
Junk Culture Dictionary of Argot
art-fart.hum
The Art of the Fart by the Guild Thieves
atombomb.hum
How to Make an Atomic Bomb in 10 Easy Steps
att.txt
Dealing with an AT&T Telemarketer
aussie.lng
Dictionary of Australian Speak
b-2.jok
Statement by Rep. Edward J. Markey against the B-2 stealth bomber, July 26
bad
Things Might Seem Really Bad
bad-d
You Know it's a Bad Day When.... by the Red Phantom
bad.jok
You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when.....
badday.hum
A Basically Bad Day
bagelope.txt
The Ecology of the Bagelope, by Kel'anth (Bagels to You and Me)
bank.rob
Rules for Bank Robbers
barney.cn1
The Barney Chronicles, Volume 1, Issue 1, by Chameleon Prime
barney.txt
The Day of the Barney
bb
Role Playing Beavis and Butthead
bbq.txt
Legal Agreement to Host a Barbeque
beapimp.hum
How to Be a Pimp, guaranteed to... well, maybe not.
beave.hum
Beaver Gone Bad! Fiction by Pete Stocton and Baron Von Crash
beer.hum
52 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women
beerdiag.txt
Beer Diagnostics List
beerjesus.hum
Why Beer is Better than Jesus
bible.txt
Bible Misinterpretations
bigpic1.hum
The Big Picture (Iceland Summit) by A. Whitney Brown
billcat.hum
Exploring Bill the Cat's Brain, by Motorhead
bimg.prn
The Bimbo Glossary
bitchcar.hum
How to make The Most Bitchenest Car, by The Dead Kennedy
bitnet.txt
Nutworks, the Electronic Humor Magazine Issue #21 (January, 1988)
blackapp.hum
Rabidly offensive racist employment form
blackhol.hum
New Information on Black Holes
blaster.hum
How to make a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
bless.bc
Bless B.C. I Stay
blooprs1.asc
The World According to Student Bloopers by Richard Lederer of St. Paul's School
bmdn01.txt
ABL's Barney Must Die Newsletter Issue #1 (May 1993)
boatmemo.jok
The Summer Boat Ride Memos
boe.hum
Tales from the Bureau of Explosives
boneles2.txt
Manifesto of the Church of Holly Farms by Clorox Albatross
bored.txt
Things to Do When Bored
boston.geog
Boston Geography in One Paragraph
browneco.hum
Conference with Christopher Browne of Hagar
btcisfre.hum
Bill the Cat is MY Friend! By the Motorhead
bugbreak.hum
How to Make Bugs Breakdance, by The Daredevil
bugs.txt
How to Make Bugs Breakdance by The Daredevil (Includes Menu of Textfiles)
butwrong.hum
But it Would Be Wrong, by Bill Safire
buzzword.hum
How to whip out some corporate buzzwords
bw-phwan.hat
Philosophical Ramblings by Buckwheat
bw-summe.hat
Just what the hell IS Summer?
cabbage.txt
The Night of the Cabbage Patch Kids, by Thomas Covenant of the Phido Phreaks
calculus.txt
The Event of the Calculus Exam
calif.hum
Why I Hate California
calvin.txt
Interview with Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes) running for President
cancer.rat
Living in Cages Linked to Cancer in Lab Rats!
carowner.txt
The 6 Major Personality Traits of Car Owners, from Weld Pond
cars.txt
Large List of "Alternate" Acronyms for Lots of Car Makes
cartoon.law
The Cartoon Laws, by Trevor Paquette and Lt. Justin D. Baldwin
cartoon.laws
The Cartoon Laws, by Trevor Paquette & Lt. Justin D. Baldwin
cartoon_.txt
O'Donnell's Laws of Cartoon Motion, from the June 1980 Esquire
cartoon_laws.txt
The Cartoon Laws, by Trevor Paquette & Lt. Justin D. Baldwin
cartwb.son
Alternate Explanation for the Lyrics in a Bugs Bunny Song
catballs.hum
Looking at the Cat's Balls, by Charles Bulkowski
catin.hat
Sigmund Freud on Seuss, by Josh LeBeau
catranch.hum
Dewey, Cheatham, and Screw Internal Memorandum
catstory.txt
A Cat, a Tree, and a New Word
cbmatic.hum
The New Ronco CB-Matic
cform2.txt
Standardized Bonehead Reply Form
chainltr.txt
The Toilet Chain letter
change.hum
A Comedy of Errors around Cable Cars
cheapin.la
Supposedly True Funny Interoffice Memo from the LA Times
chickens.jok
How Many Chickens Can You Fit Into a Generic Pontiac?
childhoo.jok
The Etiology & Treatment of Childhood
childrenbooks.txt
Children's Books You'll Never See
chinesec.hum
Chinese Profanity Translations
chunnel.txt
Ode to the Chunnel, or Why the English do Not Want a Channel Tunnel
church.sto
Funny (Supposedly True) Church Stories
climbing.let
Climbing Letters to the Editor Part II
co-car.jok
How to Recognize a Company Car
cockney.alp
The Cockney Alphabet
coffee.txt
Smurf Liberation Front presents the S.L.F. Coffee File by Lithium Clown
coffeebeerwomen.txt
Coffee and Beer: Better Then Women
cogdis.txt
Short Paper about Cognitive Dissondance
cold.fus
I'm Going to Assume This is Some Sort of HillBilly joke.
coldfake.hum
How To Fake Cold Symptoms by The Daredevil
collected_quotes.txt
Aaron Fuegi's Collected Quotations
college.hum
The Top Ten Lists Go to College, by The Deth Vegetable
college.sla
The Complete College Slang Dictionary
college.txt
How to Get into College by Ian Osmond (Xiphias Gladius)
commutin.jok
Commuting for the Beginner
computer.txt
Things to Do in a Computer Lab
comrevi1.hum
Don Tylers Splash Page: Comic Reviews, Setember 1985
conan.txt
The Adventures of Conan the Librarian, by Alan Arnold
confucius_say.txt
Confucius Say.....
consp.txt
A Complete List of All The Stuff That's Probably in the Big Government Warehouse of All The Stuff You're Not Supposed to Know About
contract.moo
Some Completely Over the Top Contract
cookie.1
The Fortune Cookie File from Karl Lehenbauer (January 14, 1989)
cooking.jok
A Definition of Cooking Terms
coollngo2.txt
Cyberpunk Street Slang: The Cool Lingo of 2020
cooplaws
Cooper's Laws of Life
cops.txt
Top Twelve Things NOT to Say to a Cop
corporat.txt
The Creation of Corporate Policy
court.quips
Disorder in the Court: a Collection of 'Transquips' by Richard Lederer
cowexplo.hum
The Legend of the Cow Exploder!
coyote.txt
COYOTE v. ACME (Wiley E. Coyote, Plaintifff v. Acme Company, Defendant)
cuchy.hum
La Cucaracha, by Mr. Sandman
cucumber.jok
The "why cu_CUM_bers are better than men" list
cucumber.txt
Why Cucumbers are Better Than Men
curiousgeorgie.txt
Curious Georgie by The Penguin
curse.txt
Spanish Obscenities and Insults Dictionary by Midnight Sorrow
d-ned.hum
The Saga of D-Ned.
dark.suc
The Theory of Dark Suckers by Paul Holmgren
dead-r
50 Extended Uses for a Dead Rubber, by The Banana Peel and the Garbage Can
dead2.txt
DEAD2.DOC: A Musical Drama in -V- Parts from the Dedaparamaxx Productions
dead3.txt
DEAD3.DOC: Our Heroes Enter Cyberspace by Dedaparamaxxaginos Productions
dead4.txt
DEAD IV: Revenge of the Siberian Dwarf Teenage Mutant Ninja Samurai BBS Girls from Hell with Hormones That Go Bump In the Night: A Romance
dead5.txt
DEAD V: Raiders of the Lost Byte by Dedaparamaxxaginos
deathhem.txt
Standard Procedure on Death of Employee (A Memo, April 1, 1985)
dedpussy.txt
50 Uses for the Household Pussy, by Gross Genitalia, December 04, 1989
deep.txt
Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey
defectiv.hum
Devective Defectors
desk.txt
Top Things that Suck at Emerson College's Library
deterior.hum
DETERIORATA
devils.jok
Excerpts from "The Devil's Dictionary", by Ambrose Pierce, 1911
diesmurf.txt
A Collection of Anti-Smurf Poetry, by The Smuggler and the Highwayman of Underground Communications (1985)
dieter.txt
Transcription of a Mike Myers "Sprockets" Skit from Saturday Night Live
dingding.hum
A Little Ding In the Door
dirtword.txt
Words that are Not Heard on Public TV, by George Carlin
disaster.hum
Reflections on Disaster
disclmr.txt
A General Disclaimer
disclym.txt
The Supreme Disclaimer
doc-says.txt
What the Doctor Says and What the Doctor Means
docdict.txt
A Little Editing Needed Here (The Doctor as Humorist)
docspeak.txt
What the Doctor Says and What He Really Means
doggun.sto
Freeze! I'm Armed with a Dog!
donut.txt
How Different Philosophies Handle The Donut
dover.poem
The Dover Poem, by KWH 1981
drinker.txt
The Drinkers' Fault-Finding Guide
drinking.tro
The Drinkers' Fault-Finding Guide
drinkrul.jok
Philosophies of Life
drive.txt
Macho Driving in Massachusetts
dromes.txt
Here's a Bunch of Palindromes
druggame.hum
Take Me Out to the Drug Game
drunk.txt
You know it's time to go on the wagon when...
dthought.txt
Collection of Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
dubltalk.jok
The Quarterly Review of Doublespeak, 1988
dym
Speaking in Texican: A Primer
eandb.drx
How Ernie and Bert Came to Be, by The Durex Blender Corporation
eatme.txt
Eat Mee Kitchen, Chinese Food to Eat Out
econridl.fun
Who paid for the Englishman? A Riddle
electric.txt
Primer for Homeowners: The Electrical System
element.jok
Scientists Discover Administratium, the Heaviest Element
elephant.fun
Determining Your Job By How You Hunt Elephants
elevator.fun
50 Fun Things to Do in an Elevator by Toni Ralston
empeval.txt
Profanity-Laden New Employee Evaluation Form
engineer.hum
The Condemned: A poem
english
Some examples of weird things that came in the English Language
english.txt
A Collection of Language Questions with Answers
engrhyme.txt
Poem about the foolishness of English
enlightenment.txt
Drime Your Karma, Curb Your Dogma: Swami Beyondananda's Guidelines for Enlightenment
enquire.hum
The New, Improved National Enquirer, 1985
epitaph
Epitaths, Famous Last Words
eskimo.nel
The Ballad of Eskimo Nell
exam.50
50 Fun Things To Do During a Final You Were Going To Fail Already
excuse.txt
Excuses for Turning Down a Date
excuse30.txt
Top Excuses for Arriving Late to French Class, including French Translations!
excuses.txt
A Collection of Typical School Excuses
f_tang.txt
Frank Tang Sell Best Good Mushroom! (From National Lampoon)
failure.txt
A Collection of Complete and Utter Failures
farsi.phrase
Useful Farsi Phrases for American Officers Traveling to Iran
farsi.txt
Useful Farsi Phrases for Americans Travelling to the Middle East
fartinfo.txt
The Facts about Flatulence, by Margaret C. McDonald
fartting.txt
...on Farting, by Bosk
fascist.txt
101 Ways to Annoy a Fascist, by The Deth Vegetable
fbipizza.txt
JOKE: The FBI Orders Pizza (1996)
fed.txt
AOL Feds, by Shot
fegg!int.txt
Dr. Fegg's Encyclopaedia of *All* World Knowledge (Formerly the NASTY BOOK) (April 9, 1994)
feggaqui.txt
Dr. Fegg's Encyclopedia of *All* World Knowledge (Apil 11, 1994)
feggmagi.txt
Dr. Fegg's Encyclopedia of *All* World Knowledge (Magic) (April 10, 1994)
female.jok
Chemical Analysis on the "Woman" Element
figure_1.txt
AT&T Customer Service Memorandum (See Figure 1)
final-ex.txt
The Ultimate Final Examination
finalexm.hum
Final Examination from Hell
fireplacein.txt
He Swears This is a True Story about the Fireplace
firstaid.inf
Quick First Aid Card
firstaid.txt
First Aid for Non-Medically Minded Persons
flattax.hum
The Flat-Out Tax Revisited
flowchrt
FlowChart for Problem-Solving
flowchrt.txt
Problem Solving Flowchart
flux_fix.txt
A Very Large Amount of Random Thinking
footfun.hum
Cops Recover Human Foot in Sewer
forsooth.hum
Mother Spanks Son and Blows Up
free-cof.fee
The Coffee Manifesto by Steve Guccione (June 11, 1990)
freshman.hum
A Quick note to the Freshman of Horace Greeley
freudonseuss.txt
Freud on Seuss by Josh LeBeau: A Review (From the UCSD Humor Magazine)
from.hum
From the 60's to the 80's
fuck!.txt
The Greatness of the word "Fuck"
fuckyou2.txt
Toxic Shock Presents: Fuck You Too, I I Hate Your Guts (Toxic File #49)
fusion.gal
Fusion Girl (Scientific Song Parody) by Bill Higgins (1989)
fusion.sup
Observation of Warm Nuclear Fusion in Condensed Soup
fwksfun.hum
Fireworks Foibles and Follies
gaiahuma
The Rules for Being a Human
ganamembers.txt
How to Identify Gang Members
gas.txt
The Fart Classification Chart (Fart Chart)
gd_guide.txt
Game Developer Magazine Writer Guidelines
german.aut
English and German Driving Terms
girlspeak.txt
Girlspeak to English Dictionary
godmonth.txt
The God of the Month Club
goforth.hum
o Forth and Wait, a Play in One Act
gohome.hum
Group Opposed to Harboring Movers from the East (G.O. H.O.M.E.)
good.txt
How to Write Good, by Frank L. Visco
gown.txt
A Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown, by Charles E. Siem
grail.txt
The Strictly Unofficial Script of Monty Python and the Holy Grail (January 25, 1989)
grammar.jok
The Future of the English Language, Demonstrated
grommet.hum
Help! The Grommet's Missing!
grospoem.txt
Redone Nursery Rhymes, with WAY too many disclaimers at the top
growth.txt
Personal Growth Courses from hell
hack
Memo To Employees: You Can Never Leave
hacktest.txt
The Hacker Test (Version 1.0) by Felix Lee, John Hayes and Angela Thomas (June 16, 1989)
harmful.hum
Dirty Air
hate.hum
I HATE EVERYTHING
headlnrs
A Collection of True Newspaper Headlines that Merit a Second Glance
hecomes.jok
The Legend of Mad Martin
height.txt
The Height of ________ is..
hell.jok
Welcome to Hell!
hell.txt
A List of Things in Hell
herb!.hum
Herb? Who's Herb? Where's He From!?!?
hi.tec
Completely Bizzare Diseases
hierarch.txt
The Heirarchy of a Business
hilbilly.wri
Medical Terminology for the Layperson
history2.oop
A History of the Past: Life Reeked with Joy
hitler.59
The Top 59 Mistakes Made by Adolf Hitler (To Err is Hitler)
hitler.txt
The Top 59 Mistakes Made by Adolf Hitler
hitlerap.txt
Mel Brooks' Hitler Rap
hoonsrc.txt
Auckland Hoon's Road Code
hoosier.txt
You know you're a Hoosier when......
horoscop.jok
Horoscopes for Philosophy Graduate Students by Lije
horoscop.txt
Horoscopes for Philosophy Graduate Students, by Lije
horoscope.txt
Your Lifetime Horoscope
hotel.txt
Some Foriegn Signs That Attempt To Be In English
hotnnot.hum
He Warelock tells you What's Hot and What's Not
how.bugs.breakd
How to make Bugs Breakdance by The Daredevil of The Police Station
how2bgod.txt
How to Be God Book II by Rusty Nail, Flat Tire, Jim
how_to_i.pro
How to Identify Professors
howlong.hum
How Long Things Take
hstlrtxt.txt
You Know You're from Hustler, Wisconsin, When.....
htswfren.txt
How to Swear in French by Cherry Poptart
hum2
The Who's On First Routine by Abbot and Costello
humatra.txt
HUMATRANS: A Transportation Device for Homo Sapiens
humatran.jok
HUMATRANS (A Transportation Device for Homo Sapiens) (Reviews)
humor9.txt
You Might Be a Redneck if....
humpty.dumpty
The Story of Humpty Dumpty
icm.hum
Another First for ICM
idaho.txt
The True Story of Idaho
idr2.txt
The Industrial Dude Ranch Letter
imbecile.txt
Position Available: Imbecile!
imprrisk.hum
Enhancing the Game "Risk" by Redd Slaver
impurmat.hum
Impure Mathematics
incarhel.hum
Jason's 15 Incarnations of Hell
initials.rid
Some of the Ancient Riddles from the Past, by Peter Young (The Initial Riddle) (May 25, 1989)
inlaws1.txt
The Book of the In-Lawys
inquirer.txt
The Irrational Enquirer: Headlines
ins1
The Rules for Being Human
insanity.hum
Keeping Insanity in the Closet, by The Weatherman
insult
28 Laughing Ways to Insult Your Friends and Enemies
insult.lst
A Completely Bizzare List of Insults of All Sorts
insults1.txt
Yo Momma So Fat, I Have a List of Several Hundred Insults
insuranc.sty
Some Stories about why Insurance Companies Suck
insure.hum
He hurt himself because he lost his presence of mind.
interv.hum
Interview with Elder Berri abut Nabih Berry
investi.hum
Investigation into the "Lynch Mob"
iqtest
Your Intelligence Test
is_story.txt
The Story on the CD by Information Society, grabbed by Andro and Tetsuo Shima
italoink.txt
Badly Faked Italian Letter Indicating the Letter-Writer is an Idiot
ivan.hum
Ivan and the Burlap Quilt
jac&tuu.hum
The Real Story behind Jacob Riis and The Unknown User
japrap.hum
We're Jap Girls, we Take No Crap
jargon.phd
Glossary for Research Papers: Strictly Speaking
jason.fun
Jason Sadofsky: The Tribune Articles 1986-1988
jc-elvis.inf
JESUS and ELVIS - Coincidence, or Cosmic Plan?
jeffie.heh
Oops! Jeff is in TROUBLE.....
johann
Why it is No-one remembers Johann?
jokeju07.txt
Actual Messages from Real Church Bulletins
jokes
Collection of Tasteless Jokes
jokes.txt
Joke Blab from the Datanet. Edited By The Slipped Disk
jokes1.txt
The Zen of Cat Bathing
jrrt.riddle
Collection of Really Old Riddles
just2
How to Know You're Growing Older: A List
justify
Strange Text Justification Experiment
kid2
Jessica Gets it All Wrong
kid_diet.txt
New Infants' Miracle Diet for Overweight People
killer.hum
He's the Walk In Killer
killself.hum
101 Ways to Kill Yourself!
kilsmur.hum
A Compilation of Anti-Smurf Poetry
kloo.txt
The Kloo Gnomes Present: The Not-So-Sacred Book of Kloos
koans.txt
Collection of Zen Koans
la_times.hun
Interoffice Memos and Tar
labels.txt
Some Labels.....
lampoon.jok
The Harvard Lampoon, "Bored of the Rings"
languag.jok
The ACTUAL Uses for Each Language
law.sch
A Law School Chronology... Will they Be Lawyers or Not?
lawhunt.txt
Washington 1986/87 Attorney Season and Bag Limits
laws.txt
Interesting US Laws, taken from the Seattle P-I
lawskool.txt
A Welcome Speech Supposedly Delivered by Dean William S. Prosser to his Freshman Law Students
lawsuniv.hum
Rules of the Universe, by the Masters of the Universe
lawyer.jok
The Canonical List of Lawyer Jokes
lawyers.txt
How Many Lawyers?
lazarus.txt
From the Notebooks of Lazarus LONGINT (Parody of Lazarus Long)
lbinter.hum
The Lord British Online Conference
leech.txt
The Leech at Work by The Rocker
legal.hum
The Law Enforcement Translator
let.go
A Captain Writes His Insurance Report
letgosh.txt
A Large Comedy of Errors in the Ship's Log
letter.txt
Best of the David Letterman Top 10 Lists
letter_f.sch
A Letter From School
libraway.txt
Pat Robertson speaks out for Anal Retention sufferers
liceprof.sty
Funny Passage from Gordon Ostlere, "Doctor in the House," 1952
lif&love.hum
Life and Love, by Tristan Farn0n
lifeimag.hum
"All in a Days Imagination", by Theta Sigma
lifeinfo.hum
The Meaning of Life (The Computer Game)
limerick.jok
Small Collection of Dirty Lyrics
lines.jok
A List of Classic (?) Pick-Up Lines
lion.jok
The "Classic" How to Catch a Lion
lion.txt
The Many Weird Ways to Catch a Lion
lions.cat
A Contribution to the Mathematical Theory of Big Game Hunting (Hunting Using Math Theories)
livnware.hum
The Song 'Livin on a Ware' by Eddie and the Lusers
llamas.txt
The Mettle Of Our Llamas
lll.hum
The Legume Liberation League Manifesto
llong.hum
The Notebooks of Lazarus Long
lobquad.hum
The Lobster Quadrille, by Lewis Carroll
looser.hum
How to Spot a Loset, by The Incognito of 202 Alliance
losers84.hum
The Official 1984 LozerList by The Atom
losers86.hum
The Losers of 1986, by Micro Magician/The Fugitive
lotsa.jok
Grab-Bag of Jokes
lozers
Chucko's Guide for Detecting Lozer Users
lozerzon.hum
The Loser Zone, by The Circle Spellbook
lozeuser.hum
The LoserUsers: A Documentary, by Trash Compactor
lp-assoc.txt
Life Placement Associates, by Daniel P Dern
lucky.cha
Judge Who You Are by the Lucky Charms Marshmallows you Like
ludeinfo.hum
The Luding Chronicles, by Sinbad Sailor!
ludeinfo.txt
The Basics of Luding
luggage.hum
The Lost Luggage Scam
luvstory.txt
Dead IV: The Book of Dead
luzerzo2.hum
Another Tale From The Loser Zone: Black Buccaneer
m0dzmen.hum
The Trabelling M0dzmen, Part II
macsfarm.old
The Tragic Tale of Old MacDonald's Farm, a Personnel Saga by A. Mouse
madhattr.jok
How to Ceelbrate Mad Hatter Day
madscrib.hum
The Writings of the Mad Scribe, Volume III
maecenas.hum
Marcenas, by Chuck Capaldi
mailfrag.hum
Mail Fraud, by L.E. Pirate
makebeer.hum
Homemade Beer, by The Whizz
making_y.wel
Making your Serviceman Feel Welcome
malechem.txt
MEN: The Chemical Analysis
manager.txt
Managerese to Engineerese Translation Dictionary
manilla.hum
Mania in Manilla
manners.txt
Types of Real Trouble
manspace.hum
A timeline of Men in Space, 1962-1984
marines.hum
The Outer Space Marines
marriage.hum
Collection of Marriage Witticisms
mash.hum
Script from M*A*S*H
math.1
Quotes from lecturers at Cambridge University, England
math.2
Quotes from lecturers at Cambridge University, England
math.far
How Math Has Been Taught in the Last Few Decades
mcd.txt
Customer Service Card for McDonnell Douglas Products
meinkamp.hum
Well, it's more about Unicorns than Hitler...
mel.txt
The Story of Mel, a Real Programmer, by Ed Nather (May 21, 1983)
melodram.hum
All that Glitters: A Play
memo.hum
Important Acronym-filled Memo
men&wome.txt
Why Men and Women Get Along So Well
mensroom.jok
A Guide to Proper Etiquette in the Men's Restroom
merry.txt
The Merry Pranksters And the Art of the Hoax, by Mark Dery
miamadvi.hum
Miami Ad-Vice, by Thos. M. O'Brien
miami.hum
Captain Goodnight's Tale of Geek Darkness
miamimth.txt
City of Miami High School Mathematics Proficiency Exam
middle.age
History from the Middle Ages to the Present in 70 Messed-Up Lines
miranda.hum
Some Improved Miranda Warnings
misc.1
A LArge Collection of Miscellaneous Jokes and Humor
misery.hum
Misery is....
missheav.hum
Missing Heaven by 18 Inches
modstup
A Model of Stupidity by Greg Borek
montpyth.hum
Monty Python Interview, Q Magazine, 1987
moonshin
How to Make Moonshine! By Phinneas J. Whoopie, III
moose.txt
The Story of Moose Skin Bengt, by Uggadunk v3.0
moslem.txt
Important tips for Mideastern Travelers
mothers.txt
A Mother's Dictionary
motrbike.jok
Reasons why Motorcyles Are Better Than Women
mowers.txt
Some Notes on the Operation of Rotary Lawn Mowers
mr.rogers
Some Poor Guy Fired for Playing Mr. Rogers
mrscienc.hum
Omnibus of Mr. Science Answers
mtm.hum
The Mary Tyler Moore Show Listing
mundane.v2
The Mundanity Test (Version 2.0) (December 1, 1990)
murph.jok
Murphy's Laws and Other Observations
murphy.txt
Murhpy's Law, and Similar Ilk
murphy_l.txt
Famous Murphy's Laws and Other Aphorisms
murphys.txt
The Absolute Laws to Live By (From Murphy)
mutate.hum
Self-Mutation using Programming
mydaywss.hum
My Day with the Secret Service Men, by The Incognito
myheart.hum
My Heart - Christ's Home, by Robert Munger
naivewiz.hum
A Children's Guide to Magic, by The Silver Ghost
nasaglenn.txt
Top 10 Changes NASA made for John Glenn's Shuttle Trip
naughty.hum
SEVEN Dirty Words? Try DOZENS!
netnews.10
The Top Ten Problems with Netnews
newconst.hum
New Constitution Ideas
newmex.hum
See the Map, See New Mexico, no, New Mexico, not Mexico
news.hum
Short Takes on the News
nigel.1
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog
nigel.10
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog Part II
nigel.2
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 02
nigel.3
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 03
nigel.4
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 04
nigel.5
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 05
nigel.6
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 06
nigel.7
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 07
nigel10.txt
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog Part 10
nihgel_8.9
The Saga of Nigel the Hedgehog 08
nintendo.jok
Leo L. Schwab is Particularly Pissed at the Nintendo Cereal System
normal.boy
Cap'n Jasper's Crow's Nest: The Rules for the Normal Boy (May 1935)
normalboy.txt
The 10 Commandments for the Normal Boy
nosuch_nasfic
Dig from Houston about Science Fiction
novel.hum
A Science Fiction Blabnovel
nuke.hum
Making Your Very Own Nuke
nukeplay.hum
Nuclear War and the Politics of Agression, by The Mathematician
nukewar.jok
Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
nukewar.txt
NUKE: The Nuclear Age Magazine (How to Start Nuclear War)
nukwaste
Yet Another Modest Proposak: The Roentgen Standard
number
It's All About the Numbers...
number.killer
The Number That's So Big It Kills You
number_k.ill
The Killion: The Number That Kills You
nurds.hum
What Makes a Nurd Most, by Mad Max
nysucks.hum
The Entire Northeast Sucks!
o-ttalk.hum
The Wonder and the Glory of ORCUTT TALK
oam-001.txt
The Monster in the Toilet Bowl, by Stumpy
oam.nfo
Come to the One Armed Monkeys BBS by Stumpy
oasis
Oasis of Greed (Taking a Trip to Las Vegas) by Dave Bealer and Greg Borek
odd_to.obs
An Ode to Those who Toil in Obscurity
odearakk.hum
An Ode to Arrakis. What the Hell is Arrakis?
office.txt
Humorous Interoffice Memo about Problems in Renovation
ohandre.hum
Oh, Andrea Mitchell! by Thos. O'Brien
oilgluts.hum
Oil Gluts are For Gluttons
old.txt
Compilation of "Old XXX Never Die, They Just ....." jokes, by Mark Israel (1992)
oldeng.hum
"One Of A Kind" From the Electronic Edition of One-To-One
oldtime.sng
The REAL Old Time Religion, to the tune of "That Old Time Religion"
one.par
The Parachute Paradigm: What Do You Do with Two people, one Parachute?
onetoone.hum
The October 26, 1987 Issue of One To One
onetotwo.hum
The October 19, 1987 Issue of One To One
ookpik.hum
OOK PIK
opinion.hum
A Quick Opinion poll
oracle.jok
The Usenet Oracle has Pondered Your Question Deeply...
ourfathr.txt
The Revised Lord's Prayer
outawork.erl
99 Excuses for Skipping Out of Work Early
oxymoron.jok
Collection of Oxymorons, some of Which are not Oxymorons, but hey.
oxymoron.txt
Small Collection of Oxymorons
ozarks.hum
A Little Known Castle in the Ozarks
p-law.hum
The Power of Law, to the tune of "Power of Love"
paddingurpapers.txt
Padding Your Papers
parabl.hum
The parable of the Prodigal Student, by Mike Mahoney
passage.hum
Carol Dietz got off the train and didn't look back.
passenge.sim
A New Concept in Flight Simulators: The Passenger Simulator
peanuts.txt
How to Open a Packet of Dry-Roasted Peanuts
peatchp.hum
The Great Peach Pilferage, by Bruce E. Rodgers
pecker.txt
Open Letter to Taxpayers: We're going to Tax Your Genitals
penisprt.txt
The low-Cost Penis Protection Plan
pepsideg.txt
The Pepsi Degeneration by Morpheous
phony.hum
Real Phony House Plants
phorse.hum
The Purple Horse, not by Don Marquis
phunatdi.ana
How to have Phun at your Parents' Dinner Party by Mr. Mullins
pickup.lin
The Canonical List of Male Pickup Lines
pickup.txt
Collection of Pickup Lines
pipespec.txt
The "Irish Government" Pipe Specifications
pizzawho.hum
The Effect of Dimensional Transcendence on Cheese
planeget.hum
This is Your Guide to Plane Hijacking!
pol-corr.txt
New Official Politically Correct Terms for 1991
polemom.txt
Letter to Son from polish mom
poli.tics
Politics Made Simple by the Application of Cows
poli_t.ics
Politics Expressed by Cows
policpig.hum
Calling a Policeman a Pig, from The Anarchist Cookbook
poll2res.hum
Predictions for 2007
polly.txt
The Story of Impure Mathematics
polly_.new
Impure Mathematics, the Story of Polly Nomial
polyglot.c
The HELLO, POLYGLOTS program
poopie.txt
The Poopie List
popconc.hum
Pope Concerts, by Thos. M. O'Brien
popmach
How to Rip off the Pop Machines
popmusi.hum
Pop Music Explained, by Thos. M. O'Brien
post.nuc
Some Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
potty.txt
A Guide to Proper Etiquette in the Men's Restroom
pournell.spo
Spoof of Jerry Pournelle Articles from BYTE Magazine
prac1.jok
Super Collection of Practical Jokes (part 1 of 4)
prac2.jok
Super Collection of Practical Jokes (Part 2 of 4)
prac3.jok
Super Collection of Practical Jokes (part 3 of 4)
prac4.jok
Super Collection of Practical Jokes (part 4 of 4)
pracjoke.txt
Collection of Practical Joke Ideas
practica.txt
The Ultimate List of Practical Jokes
prawblim.hum
What's up with these MIDDAY COMMERCIALS?
prayer.hum
Governor Edwards' Prayer
primes.jok
Is Nine Prime?
princess.brd
The "Reunion Scene" from _The_Princess_Bride_
pro-fact.hum
Miscellaneous Facts about Abortion
problem.txt
E-Z Problem Solving Flowchart
progrs.gph
The Definite Last Word on Geeks by Diamond Dave Letterman
proof.met
Examples of Different Methods of "Proof"
prooftec.txt
Weirdly Rewritten Collection of Proofs
proposal.jok
What those Proposals Really Mean
prover.wisom
The Book of Proverbial Wisdom
prover_w.iso
The Book of Proverbial Wisdom
psalm.reagan
The Psalm of Ronald Reagan
psalm23.txt
Psalm 23, 1992 Version
psalm_nixon
The Nixon's Prayer
psalm_re.aga
Reasan's Psalm
psilaine.hum
PSI-Laine Magazine, Issue #1, 1988
psych_pr.quo
Quotes from Professor Ralph Noble, a Professor of Psychology at RPI
psycho.txt
Managing Interpersonal Relationships
pukeprom.jok
My Story of Puking at My Prom After Eating Pizza Drunk!
pun.txt
A Collection of Shaggy Dog Stories
pure.mat
Pure Poor Percy P
pussy.hum
Man, I sure Do Love Them Cats
puzzle.spo
The Solution to the "I know Now!" Mathematical Puzzle
puzzles.jok
Completely Freaky Lateral Thinking Puzzles
python_s.ong
The Monty Python Philosphers' Song
q.pun
Large Collection of "Q" Puns
quack26.txt
The Holy Book of QUACK!
quantum.jok
The Actual History of Quantum MEchanics
quantum.phy
The Topic for Today is Quantum Physics, by Andrew Arensburger (June 12, 1989)
quest.hum
Quest, by Plastique
quick.jok
Quick List of Joking Definitions
quotes.bug
Collection of Lesser Known Quotes from the Engineers of Hewlett Packard
quotes.jok
Collection of Interesting Quotes from All Over
quotes.txt
Some Quotes from the Usenet Newsgroup "rec.arts.comics"
quux_p.oem
The Great Quux: Random Poetry and Other Loses, by Guy L. Steele, Jr.
r-smurf.d&d
The Smurf Class in D&D
rabbit.txt
Confess That You're a Rabbit!
racist.net
Someone Gets REALLY Oversensitive about the Usenet
radiolaf.hum
The American Comedy Network!
rapmastr.hum
Rap Master Ronnie (Reagan)
ratings.hum
Rock Record Ratings
ratspit.hum
De-Ethylene Bromate by Stud Muffin
raven.hum
Interrip Report on the Raven
readme.bat
Holy Time-Warp, Batman!
reagan.hum
Quite Note off to John Hinckley
realest.txt
Real Estate Ads Translated
reasons.txt
Reasons Why a Three Week Old Dog Turd is Better Than a Woman
rec.por
Parody about Brad Tampleton's Racist Joke Debate
record_.gap
The Lurker in the interrecord Gap
red-neck.jks
You Might Be Considered a Redneck if....
reddwarf.sng
Ghost Filkers In The Hall (Filk Song)
reddye.hum
Caught Red Handed, by Thos. O'Brien
rednecks.txt
You Know You're a Redneck if....
relative.ada
Relativity, by Patrick D. Scannell
religion.txt
The Shit List!
renorthr.txt
Northridge Earthquake Signage (April 10, 1994)
rent-a_cat
I Would Like to Borrow a Cat
rentals.hum
Rental Cars, by Thos. O'Brien
repair.hum
How to Repair Electronic Equipment
report.hum
Report on Ethan Fromme
research.hum
Research Definitions
residncy.jok
Application to Live in New Hampshire
resolutn.txt
Some New Year's Resolutions, from 1989-1992
resrch_p.hra
Dictionary of Useful Research Phrases
resrch_phrase
A Dictionary of Useful Research Phrases
revolt.dj
Dick and Jane Instigate a Popular Revolt, by The Deth Vegetable and Iskra
rinaldo.jok
Rinaldo's Laws of Organizations
rinaldos.law
Rinaldo's laws of organizations
rinaldos.txt
Rinaldo's Laws
ripoffpc.hum
Hey, Robert Briggs was REALLY Ripped Off!
roach.asc
Search is On for World's Biggest Roach
roadpizz.txt
The Complete Guide to Road Pizza written by Black Kat
robot.tes
Are You About to Employ a Robot? (A Test) (December 2, 1989)
rocking.hum
The Daredevil's Classifications of Rock Music
rockmus.hum
The Effects of Rock Music
rocky.hor
The Rocky Horror Picture Show Script and Suggested Audience Participation
rocky_ho.rro
Rocky Horror Script/Suggestions for Audience Participation
roi.txt
JOKE: Notice of Revocation of Independence, from the BBC
rolls.hum
Would You Buy a Used Rolls From This Bhagwan? By Thos. O'Brien
romance.hum
Romance Novel No. 209
roomate.txt
50 Ways to Confuse your Roommate
roommate.con
50 Ways to Confuse your Roommate
roommates
A Guide to Getting Rid of Unwanted Jerk Roommates
roseanna.hum
He Fell In love With Roseanna
rotten.jok
You can Tell It's Going To Be a Rotten Day When
rottend.txt
You Can Tell it's Going To Be A Rotten Day When....
royalfam.txt
The Royal Family - Inbred genetic mutants or hereditary con-artists?
rp.txt
Real Programmers Don't Use Pascal, Updated by Michael Stillwell (July 21, 1995)
rubber.txt
A Song by PiP the Angry Youth
rubberus
50 Extended Uses for a Dead Rubber by The Banana Peel and The Garbage Can
rubberus.hum
50 Extended Uses for a Dead Rubber
rudeflik.jok
Miss Dish's Lament
rudeness.hum
Rudeness to Reagan Awards
ruggies
How To Tell Ruggies
rules.txt
The Cardinal Rules
rulesfor.txt
William Safire's Rules for Writers
rumormil.hum
Rumor Room on Location at the Rumor Mill
russian.fun
Are we talkng Wicked or Nasty here?
safefax.txt
A Guide to Safe Fax (Humor)
saintsid.hum
A Visit by Saint Vicious
sand.hum
Sandman: A Poem
sap.txt
Selections from the Scholastic Aptitude Prepatory Test (The SAP)
sarah_st.ory
The Sarah Story (All Words Start with S)
satantre.hum
Satan Trek: The Dying Generation Vol I
sayings.hum
Celebrated Utterances, a Quiz
sayings.txt
A Saying for Every Occasion, and Every Occasion for Its Saying
sayno.hum
Starting a "Just Say No" Club
sayno.txt
101 Ways to Say No, by Vuarnet International
scavenge.93
The University of Chicago Scavenger Hunt List 1993
school.mud
Infocom Adventure about Freshman Year
sci.gra
Collection of Scientific and Futuristic One-Liners
sdvallah.hum
Stare Decisis by Alexander of Atlantis
seagull.txt
The SeaGull Electronic University Fall Semester 1990 (Humor)
seastory.txt
The Admiral Tells Your Favorite Story about Hookers and Defication (Well, your only one)
security.hum
Security on the Home Front, by Robert Brooks
selfserv.txt
Winners of the Self-Serving Excuses (April 10, 1994)
seuss.txt
The Dr. Seuss Purity Test
sexjokes.fun
Large Collection of Across the Board Offensive Jokes
sflvrs.hacker
A Beautiful obsession with the binary world, by Steven Levy
shagbook.jok
The Book of Shag
shame.hum
Shame! Naughty! Naught! From the National Satirist
shit.1
This is How Shit Happens
shit.def
Large Collection of Fecal Output Terms
shit.txt
A Collection of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.) Departments
shitlist.txt
The "Infamous" Shit List
shitmemo.txt
A Collection of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.) Departments
shorties.jok
Collection of Short Jokes
shrink.news
The Shrink Sports News
shuttleb.hum
A Moment's Horror Brings Momentous Grief
signatur.jok
Collection of Stupid .signature Files
sigs.txt
The Enormous Signature File Collection
simp.txt
Simplified Integrated Modular Prose by The Bear
sinksub.txt
Sinking a Sub, by Hellrazor
skincat
101 Ways to Skin a Cat by Master Control (1991)
skippy.hum
How to Screw with Ask the Expert
skippy.txt
Ask the Expert, written by Tristan Farnon and D'ark Angel
slogans.txt
List of Possible Slogans Promoting National Condom Week
smackjok.hum
All sorts of racist/sexist/disgusting humor.
smartass.txt
The Ultimate Final Test
smiley.txt
Large Collection of Emoticons/Smileys
smokers.txt
Short Story for Smokers Only
smurf-03.txt
The Smurf Squishers' Handbook Volume III by The Smurf Butcher Bobs (August 28, 1986)
smurf_co.txt
The SmurfCODE (1990)
smurfkil.hum
Smurf Genocide Volume #1
smurfs.cc
A Compilation of Anti-Smurf Poetry, by The Highwayman, and The Smuggler
snake_ng.ras
An MIT Student Talks about his pet Boa Constrictor
snipe.txt
SNIPE SORCERY: The Invocation of the Baboo, a Collection of False Wicca
soccer.txt
Top 10 New Precautions The British Have Taken to Avoid Soccer Voilence
socecon.hum
The New Socialism, by John K. Williams
social.hum
Economic Power, by Joseph S. Fulda
socks.drx
Where the Missing Socks from the Laundry Go, by Snarastaman
soleleer.hum
Stare Decisis Chapter 9: SOLE LEER
solviets.hum
The Soviets: What are they pulling now?
some_hu.mor
Collection of odd 1976 Newspaper Stories
soporifi.abs
The Ballade of Soporific Absorption from 1958 (January 12, 1989)
sorority.gir
Canonical List of Sorority Girl Jokes
spelin_r.ifo
Spelling Reform, a Letter at a Time
speling.msk
Indications you're reading Popular English
spider.hum
Creepy Accounting of a Tarantula Killing a Sparrow
spoonlis.txt
A List of Malapropisms, Mixed Metaphors, Spoonerisms, Etc. by Noel Giffin (February, 1993)
spydust.hum
Spy Dust Mopped Up, a Special Report
squids.gph
The True Definition of a SQUID by The Ascii Assassin
st_silic.txt
More Silliness from Saint Silicon
staff.txt
Courses Being Taught Over There or Something
standard.hum
Yet Another Modest Proposal
startrek.txt
Startrek, The Ultimate Story!
stereo.txt
Troubleshooting Your New Stereo, by P. Harris
steroid.txt
Announcing the creation of TEXT FILE STEROIDS!
stone.hum
Odd Little Story About Sucking the Life Out Of Someone
strine.txt
The Strine Dictionary, by Ure Smith, of Sydney (1965)
strsdiet.txt
The Stress Diet
studentb.txt
The World According To Student Bloopers
subrdead.hum
The Suburban Book Of The Dead, Version 1.0
suicide2.txt
13 Ways to Commit Suicide by KvM of STACC
sungenu.hum
The Latest Cult Hero: Dr. J.R. (Bob) Dobbs
supermar.rul
The Secret Supermarket Rules List
swearfrn.hum
How to Swear in French, by Cherry Poptart
sysadmin.txt
Know Your System Administrator: A Field Guide
sysman.txt
Extract from "The Way It Is" - Warner/Davis
t-10.hum
T-10, where are you?
t-shirt.hum
T-Shirts: The Human Bumpersticker
t_zone.jok
Mission Impossible Meets the Twilight Zone
takenote.jok
How to Take Notes in Professor Mitchell's Class
talebeat.hum
Rock The Story of Nick and the Intergalactic Break Dancers
talkbizr.txt
The Talk.Bizzare Board Game: Rules and Diagram
taping.hum
The TAPING I: Rag File on Jeff Spicolli
tarot.txt
Major Arcana Tarot Cards that Didn't Quite Make It
teens.txt
How to Survive the Terrible Teens: An Owners' Guide
teevee.hum
Television Programs from Outer Space
telecom.q
Large Collection of Telephone-Related Quotes
televisi.hum
How to Work in Television, or Hand Me That Piano
televisi.txt
How to Work in Television, or Hand Me That Piano, by The Great Crumal
temphell.jok
The Tempature of Heaven
terbear.txt
The Terror Bears on the Rampage, by Darkside 444
termpoem.txt
Terminal Panic, or Why Didn't I Become an English Major? By Susan Crawshaw
terms.hum
An Unabridged, Uncommon, and Unnecessary Dictionary of Computer Terminology, from King Herman
terrmcd'.hum
How to Terrorize McDonalds
terrnieg.hum
How to Terorize the Neighborhood
test.hum
Current Affairs Quiz, January, 1984
test.jok
How to Test those Christians
test2.jok
More Tests for Bibliolators
testchri.txt
Here are more tests for our Bibliolators...
texican.dic
Texasese Speak Listing, or Texas Crude Dictionary
texican.lex
List of Texas Crude (Dialect)
textgrap.hum
A REALLY old classic by Jason Scott, The Slipped Disk
tfepisod.hum
Episode Guide for Tristan Farn0n stuff
tfpoems.hum
A Few Quick Poems from Tristan Farn0n
the_ant.txt
A Quick Update to the Fable of the Ant and the Grasshopper
the_math.hel
The Math Problem From Hell
thecube.hum
Pirate Publication by Supplier
thermite.ana
Thermite Incendiaries and Formulas, by Primo Pyro
thesis.beh
101 Things Not to do at Or For Your Thesis Defense
three.lws
The Adventures of Lone Wolf Scientific
tickmoon.hum
Ticket To The Moon
timetr.hum
Time Travel: A Discussion, by Howard Ullman
tits
Head Honco Presents: Tits for Free
tnd.1
Small Collection of "Found Humor"
top10.elf
The Top Ten Elf Pickup Lines
top10.txt
The Best Letterman Top 10s from David Letterman, 1989
top10st1.txt
Silly Top Ten List Compilation (December 1992)
top10st2.txt
Additional Stupid Top 10 Lists
topten.hum
A Top Ten Look Back at the 80s by Deth Vegetable and Fidel Castro
toxcwast.hum
The Store of T0XIC WASTE
transp.txt
How to Build Your Own Transporter
trash!.hum
A Couple Headlines taken off the Tabloids
trekfume.txt
New... Trekfume: Trek Perfumes
trekwes.hum
The Next, Next Generation. How It All Began!
tribble.hum
That's Dribble, Tribble!
trukdeth.txt
Stories About Trucks And Death...By: The Penguin, The Druggie, Rockhead, Hot Mama, and Ski Guy
truthlsd.hum
ALTERNATIVE III by Leslie Watkins
truths.hum
How Do We Tell Truths That Might Hurt?
tshirts.jok
Collection of T-Shirt Sayings
tuflife.txt
Getting Through Life's Tough Stages
turbo.hum
The Turbo Encabulator in Industry
turing.shr
The Turing Shroud: An Amazing Archeological Discovery! By Chris Boyd (1990)
twinkie.txt
The Twinkie Therom, The Real Story, by CHUD
twinkies.jok
The Biology of Snack Cakes Prepared by Eric Kollenberg 21 Feb. 1986
un.happy
Things to Do When in an Unhappy Mood
units.mea
Real Bizzare Units of Measurement (February 1989)
univ.odd
List of Universities that quickly degenerates into siliness
urban.txt
Official Usenet Alt.Folklore.Urban Frequently Posted Legends
vaguemag.90s
Vague, the Magazine that Defines the 90's
valujet.txt
Short Play About the World's Safest Airline, by George F.
variety1.asc
Collection of Various Humor Textfiles
variety2.asc
Varions Humor Textfiles, Part II
variety3.asc
Various Humor Textfiles, Part III
various.txt
Various Humor Textfiles, Part IV
vegkill.txt
Is Killing Vegetables Wrong?
voltron.hum
The Story of V O L T R O N
vonthomp
Quote from Kurt Vonnegut of Hunter S. Thompson
wagit.txt
Join W.A.G.I.T. Today! White Are Good, It True.
wagon.hum
You know it's time to go on the wagon when....
waitress.txt
Health Warning: Waitresses
washroom.txt
20 Types You Meet in the Men's Room
wedding.hum
The Wedding Ends Before it Started: NY Post
weight.txt
Giving New Meaning to Working out With Weights - Russell Daily News, Feb. 24, 1992
welfare
Examples of Unclear Writing to the Welfare Department
welfare.txt
Welfare Bloopers Fare Wall (Excerpts from Applications for Welfare)
wetdream.hum
Wet Dream in Atlantis
who.txt
Did you hear about the guy who.....
whoon1st.hum
The Classic Who's On First Routine
whoops.hum
Why the National Satirist was down last week
why-me.hum
Examples of People Dying or Getting Hurt in really funny ways
wimptest.txt
Mangling Impersonal Relationships, by Dunkirk
wisconsi.txt
Collection of Wiconsonisms
wisdom
Words of Wisdom
women.jok
David's Truths About Women
wood
The Woody Sketch from Monty Python's Flying Circus
woodbine.txt
The New Woodbine Pushover Stakes
woodbugs.txt
101 Uses For Wood Bugs (those bugs that curl into a ball) by David Hooper
woodsmok.txt
Stories about the Problems with Wood-Burning Stoves
woolly_m.amm
Retrobreeding the Woolly Mammoth from the April 1984 Issue of the MIT Technology Review
word.hum
One of the Most Colorful Words in the World is FUCK!
worldend.hum
The World Ended Yesterday, by Don L. Tyler
wrdnws1.txt
Weird News: Volume 1
wrdnws2.txt
Weird News Volume 2
wrdnws3.txt
Weird News Volume 3
wrdnws4.txt
Weird News Volume 4
wrdnws5.txt
Weird News Volume 5
wrdnws6.txt
Weird News Volume 6
wrdnws7.txt
Weird News Volume 7
wrdnws8.txt
Weird News Volume 8
wrdnws9.txt
Weird News Volume 9
xibovac.txt
My Time with Xibo on my Vacation
xtermin8.hum
Leech Extermination Guide Version One
y.txt
50 Uses for the Household Pussy, by Gross Genitalia, December 04, 1989
yjohncse.hum
Why Johnny Can't Sell, a Business Report
yogisays.txt
Famous Yogi Berra Quotes
yuppies.hum
What is A Yuppie? By Uncle Stimey
zen.txt
A Collection of Zen Koans
zgtoilet.txt
Zero Gravity Toilet Instructions
zodiac.hum
The World's Most Unpleasant Zodiac